So this week has been a rough mental week. I have lacked motivation to do anything, so I’ve accomplished nothing for my sprint. My biggest obstacle was just myself and there isn’t really much of a way to get around that. One of my health issues causes these occasional bouts of depression, and that can drain my motivation and make it to where I dont really do what I should do unless it’s absolutely urgent. I even procrastinated on my mythology assignment until the last minute because of this.

Veronica was supportive, but rightfully mentioned a heads up would be nice. Unfortunately I am very bad at giving a heads up because I don’t intend to be depressed, nor do I know how long it will last. I’m also not very aware of when it’s happening in the moment. I thought I was exhausted for the most part, I was coming home from work and just melting into the couch. Every day I tell myself I’m going to do what I need to do tomorrow. Then tomorrow comes and goes and I say the same thing. Next thing I know, the end of the week is here, deadlines are tonight, and I’ve got to cram what I can’t risk into a day.

I feel like I could’ve done better with my mythology assignment, but I just got in my own way and put out some rushed effort to meet the deadline. I won’t be surprised if I get a C-level grade or lower, unless the professor just so happens to really like what I submitted for some reason. Either way I’m going to feel I left a better effort on the table and I only have myself to shoulder the blame.

The silver lining I am looking towards is that there will be no more double classes going forward. That’s the main thing I have disliked about this course program. While I understand it’s an accelerated course, doing two classes at once really messed with my pacing at times and caused me to have an imbalanced focus. So to be able to devote my attention to only this development project until graduation is a positive I want to emphasize.

I dont want this to sound negative but I really can’t wait to graduate. Only because this is a huge accomplishment for me, and I will be the only one of my family to have a Bachelor’s degree. Obviously I can’t rush reality so this doesn’t mean I’m going to rush or give a half baked effort for this project.

It’s going to be a new tomorrow.